Author Topic: Joke of the day  (Read 49413 times)

DiabolusDementis

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #300 on: April 15, 2018, 03:58:55 am »
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phaed

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #301 on: April 15, 2018, 08:58:43 pm »
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DiabolusDementis

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #302 on: April 16, 2018, 03:56:04 am »

what...the...fuck...
I know, right? LOL

Looks like a character out of a Dr. Seuss book. :o
« Last Edit: April 16, 2018, 04:04:08 am by DiabolusDementis »
NON VI VIRTUTE VICI
Measure twice, cut once.
perita manus mens exculta
"Paper money eventually returns to its intrinsic value --- zero." Voltaire (1694-1778)
"Cryptocurrency eventually returns to its intrinsic value--- zero." Me
"In times of universal deceit, speaking the truth is a revolutionary act." - George Orwell
"I believe that all government is evil, and that trying to improve it is largely a waste of time." - H. L. Mencken
"How is it, that the government can tax future generations today, but it is not considered taxation without representation?" - me

phaed

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #303 on: April 17, 2018, 02:36:43 pm »
chicks usually get fat in their ass first.  that's gotta be photoshopped.  i think there's another person in front of that wildebeast that's also distorted.  in any case...she's got tits on her back.
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DiabolusDementis

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #304 on: April 17, 2018, 06:01:32 pm »
chicks usually get fat in their ass first.  that's gotta be photoshopped.  i think there's another person in front of that wildebeast that's also distorted.  in any case...she's got tits on her back.
Here's an awful thought.

Maybe it's a dude. :o
NON VI VIRTUTE VICI
Measure twice, cut once.
perita manus mens exculta
"Paper money eventually returns to its intrinsic value --- zero." Voltaire (1694-1778)
"Cryptocurrency eventually returns to its intrinsic value--- zero." Me
"In times of universal deceit, speaking the truth is a revolutionary act." - George Orwell
"I believe that all government is evil, and that trying to improve it is largely a waste of time." - H. L. Mencken
"How is it, that the government can tax future generations today, but it is not considered taxation without representation?" - me

DiabolusDementis

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #305 on: April 17, 2018, 06:04:43 pm »
The National Poetry Contest had come down to two semifinalists: a Yale graduate and a redneck from Wyoming. They were given a word, then allowed two minutes to study the word and come up with a poem that contained the word. The word they were given was “Timbuktu”.
First to recite his poem was the Yale graduate. He stepped to the microphone and said:

Slowly across the desert sand Trekked a lonely caravan. Men on camels, two by two Destination—Timbuktu.

The crowd went crazy! No way could the redneck top that, they thought. The redneck calmly made his way to the microphone and recited:

Me and Tim a-huntin went, Met three whores in a pop up tent. They was three, and we was two, So I bucked one, and Timbuktu.
NON VI VIRTUTE VICI
Measure twice, cut once.
perita manus mens exculta
"Paper money eventually returns to its intrinsic value --- zero." Voltaire (1694-1778)
"Cryptocurrency eventually returns to its intrinsic value--- zero." Me
"In times of universal deceit, speaking the truth is a revolutionary act." - George Orwell
"I believe that all government is evil, and that trying to improve it is largely a waste of time." - H. L. Mencken
"How is it, that the government can tax future generations today, but it is not considered taxation without representation?" - me

DiabolusDementis

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #306 on: April 18, 2018, 06:08:35 pm »
NON VI VIRTUTE VICI
Measure twice, cut once.
perita manus mens exculta
"Paper money eventually returns to its intrinsic value --- zero." Voltaire (1694-1778)
"Cryptocurrency eventually returns to its intrinsic value--- zero." Me
"In times of universal deceit, speaking the truth is a revolutionary act." - George Orwell
"I believe that all government is evil, and that trying to improve it is largely a waste of time." - H. L. Mencken
"How is it, that the government can tax future generations today, but it is not considered taxation without representation?" - me

phaed

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #307 on: April 22, 2018, 02:59:30 pm »
definition of marriage:  when you love someone so much, you think you need to get the government involved
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DiabolusDementis

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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #308 on: April 24, 2018, 03:19:07 pm »
For those times when you just HAD TO eat one more burrito.



NON VI VIRTUTE VICI
Measure twice, cut once.
perita manus mens exculta
"Paper money eventually returns to its intrinsic value --- zero." Voltaire (1694-1778)
"Cryptocurrency eventually returns to its intrinsic value--- zero." Me
"In times of universal deceit, speaking the truth is a revolutionary act." - George Orwell
"I believe that all government is evil, and that trying to improve it is largely a waste of time." - H. L. Mencken
"How is it, that the government can tax future generations today, but it is not considered taxation without representation?" - me

DiabolusDementis

  • Brilliantly Foolish
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Re: Joke of the day
« Reply #309 on: April 25, 2018, 02:43:55 pm »
NON VI VIRTUTE VICI
Measure twice, cut once.
perita manus mens exculta
"Paper money eventually returns to its intrinsic value --- zero." Voltaire (1694-1778)
"Cryptocurrency eventually returns to its intrinsic value--- zero." Me
"In times of universal deceit, speaking the truth is a revolutionary act." - George Orwell
"I believe that all government is evil, and that trying to improve it is largely a waste of time." - H. L. Mencken
"How is it, that the government can tax future generations today, but it is not considered taxation without representation?" - me